How to handle rude comments about weight?

one of my best friends is absolutly beautiful but she is overweight. she has always struggled with her weight but last nite we were shopping and we walked into express cuz i needed pants and the sales lady said to her face "lane bryant is a few stores over" (how rude!!) even if ur store doesnt carry her size there was no need to say that! she gets rude comments alot and she goes to the gym every day and eats healthy but the weight isnt going to fall off over night. we went into babys r us to get clothes for our friends son and an elderly woman walked right up to her and said she would have complications if she didnt lose weight..i dunno what was worse, commenting about a strangers weight or implying shes pregnant. my friend had a good humor about it and joked she was going to name the baby Ben or Jerry if it was a boy or Sarah Lee if it was a girl...so my question is what do u say to people who are rude or stare? she goes through this alot..anyone have any stories to share or advice?

How to handle rude comments about weight?

I would definitely complain to Express. (You should have gotten the employees name...be SURE to include what the girl looked like, what time it was, and what day it was.)

When I was much younger, I was about a size 10 and my best friend was a 0. One time, she was in the fitting room and asked me to get her a shirt and when I asked the sales girl she questioned me : "Is this for YOU?". Some sales girls are just idiots. I was in Old Navy the other day trying on jeans and told the girl I needed a size smaller and she said they'd be too small on me. (THEY WEREN'T!) And when I came out of the fitting room and she said "They were too small, right?" I was "No, they actually fit, but you brought me the wrong pants. I won't be buying anything of them...Thanks"

I've been chubby all my life and am finally coming into a healthier weight... no matter how she replies, it still hurts A LOT when someone makes a comment.

For the Lane Bryant comment, something along the lines of "I appreciate the help, but I wasn't asking for it" I think it's perfectly fair to give a bit of a snippy remark back.

If someone says something general...usually something along the lines of "Thank you, I had NO idea. You're so OBSERVANT!" ...make them feel like an idiot for opening their mouths

I wish I had more advice to give you...I know I wish I did when I was younger and people did things like that to me.

Good luck and send my best wishes to your friend

How to handle rude comments about weight?

It's not nice to be rude back, but I think the idea of reporting to management is a good idea... you can explain that your friend took her business elsewhere. I'm sure that management won't want their employees to be sending their customers away. Report It

How to handle rude comments about weight?

let it go. life is too short.

How to handle rude comments about weight?

I absolutely think that if you know the woman's name who made that comment should be reported. It is tacky, rude, mean and not good for business. I think it would show your friend that you support her no matter what her size is. You sound like a very good friend. I wouldn't wait too long before you report her though, so it's still fresh in your mind.

I'm sure she is trying to have humor about it as to what her kids' names will be, but I'm sure it's just an act. I'm sure she's crushed inside. That's why I think it's a good idea for her to know you reported that 'woman' AFTER you do it, so she doesn't try to make you just 'brush it off.'

How to handle rude comments about weight?

Where exactly do you live where people just walk right up to your face with disrespectful comments like that? Up here in Detroit we don't play that, comments like that will get you beat down.

Anyway, I think your friend is doing the right thing by taking the high road. God bless her heart and tell her not to worry about what morons have to say about her weight.

How to handle rude comments about weight?

People are so ignorant %26amp; don't care about how hurtful their staring or rude comments may be. There are many things one could say to such rude people but the best thing is to just "ignore" people like that. Saying something back tells them they have struck a nerve %26amp; they like that. Your friend will lose weight %26amp; be healthy for herself %26amp; that's all that matters. I will tell you this. If I am ever in a store %26amp; a sales clerk makes a rude %26amp; hurtful comment to an overweight person, I would let them have it, right in front of everyone, then I'd walk out of the store. I would then contact the store manager %26amp; describe the incident to her/him. These sales people better be careful or they'll be charged with discrimination.

How to handle rude comments about weight?

My 'one size fits all' responses to rude questions is a flat stare and one of the following phrases:

'I'd love to know why you think that's any of your business."

"I don't recall having invited you into such a personal conversation."

"Excuse me, that was an incredibly rude thing to say."

"Do I *know* you??"

And for rude sales staff. "I'd like to talk to your manager"

And if they are truly extraordinarily rude "And you madam are ugly, but *I* can lose the weight." (To paraphrase Winston Churchill)

EDIT:

And kudos to your friend for taking steps toward health and handling the unwashed masses with a sense of humor.

How to handle rude comments about weight?

Here's something she could say:

This is a D E conversation, F off!!!

Or

I may be fat, but I can change that. But you will ALWAYS be stupid.

No really, though, I think those people have no lives if they are so "concerned" with her size. Also, they are merely trying to make themselves feel better and more confident. Maybe they are upset with how comfortable she is in her own skin, and they feel the incessant need to destroy that comfort zone for her because they are smaller and their lives are meaningless. Yet, she's bigger and she's happy. She should never accept comments like that, and if she feels the desire to defend herself, sobeit. But maybe she hasn't the courage, and that's where you, as her friend, step in, and mouth off to those folks. As for the lady at the store, she should be fired for that. Report that witch!

How to handle rude comments about weight?

She must report the woman that told her Lane Bryant is down the street, that is beyond rude. And you as her friend should go with her to be supportive. I also have a very heavy friend, although she has not received those comments she has been discriminated against because of her weight. My friend is not losing weight because she has no will power. My friend is tough though she would tell them off right to their face, maybe that is why she doesn't deal with it as much. If I was there and I heard it I would either say something too or find the manager immediately. She would say something like, Excuse me, I don't think I asked you where Lane Bryant was did I? Or Do I know you, you keep staring at me like you know me. Sometimes you just have to stick up for yourself. This is a form of discrimination that many people overlook, but it is real in the workforce, shopping, dining etc.

How to handle rude comments about weight?

What they said at Express was rude and out of line. I would file a complaint. Say "I was able to let the comment go, but your next customer may not," so they know they're treading on thin ice.

As far as the other comments go, she should say something to let them know how out of line they were, like "Wow, thanks for pointing it out. I hadn't noticed."

How to handle rude comments about weight?

I agree with the others - go back to the Express and tell the manager what happened. Doesn't Express sell stuff besides clothes - like jewelry, accessories, etc.? It was entirely possible that your friend was there to get a banging pair of earrings - the clerk didn't know why she was there!

Your friend is handling comments with an amazing amount of grace and humor. People can be real morons, but when they do it to be mean, that's another story.

How to handle rude comments about weight?

Tell her to tell them to F*** off, very simply, or she can sit on them, Stick her Middle finger right in their face, thats good for be ginners, but imagine the nerve some people have, telling things to her because of her weight.

Tell her to look and find something ugly on them and refer to them as that. like crooknose, what did you say?, or elephant ears, were you talking to me?, or Bonney...Are you a zipper, ?, stick out your tongue I want to see!. the heck with them!

How to handle rude comments about weight?

Ive just come back from being ill off of work and one of my colleagues said to me, 'You've put on weight'. I said to her 'Thanks, thats nice to know. Has it gone to my bum or thighs??'. She walked away because it showed that I wasnt bothered about it. Over here in England, people are just the same. I wouldnt go up to someone and say 'Man, you're unfortuante in the looks department!!' It amazes me that people have the audacity to do that to people.

She'll get her comeuppance, trust me!!

How to handle rude comments about weight?

i wouldve said "whos your manager?" and then adressed this ladies comment to them. If someone said that to me i wouldve punched them in the face. everyone has an opinion but do we allways need to hear it??

How to handle rude comments about weight?

Without a doubt your friend needs to complain!

If it had happened to me, I would have complained right then to the shift manager and then gone a step further and complained to the general manager.

Some people are so rude and have no class. I would have told the lady that much too.

As for the elderly woman in Babies R Us, I would have said something to the extent of "Thank you for the advice. May I ask who taught you your manners?".

How to handle rude comments about weight?

i'm sorry to hear that. what a *****.

well next time something nasty like that happens you girls should say this line:

"Hey, I can lose weight, but you'll always be ugly!"

OR report her to her manager and get her fired! BWA HA HA! I have no patience for hateful people. If I was with you I would have beat her with a tampon.

How to handle rude comments about weight?

through it back in their face say a rude comment back to them

How to handle rude comments about weight?

just say..."What was that?...You slept with a donkey?"

Works every time.

How to handle rude comments about weight?

As hard as it may be, joke around WITH them. Once they see that she's not embarrassed about it, and she's actually poking fun at herself, they'll quit!